Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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