It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
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So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
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My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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