oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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