Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
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i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
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Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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