I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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