Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
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No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
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We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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