are you still at the devil's house?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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