So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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