Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize