If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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