my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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