apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
She even gives head with a lisp.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Randomize