i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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