u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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