My first STD was from a foam party
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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