My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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