Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
This is the high leading the old right now
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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