I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize