whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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