The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
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scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
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I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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