I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize