if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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