yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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