So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize