so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I lost the right to judge tonight
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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