I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize