Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize