Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize