my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
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When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
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Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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