whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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