He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
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Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
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