i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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