remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize