I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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