People with herpes should wear stickers.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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