i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
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