Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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