Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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