I think my vagina is haunted
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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