If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize