we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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