Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
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