Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize