So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Randomize