well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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