Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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