The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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