if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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