ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
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A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
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I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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