somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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